Open Letter to the Department of Education…

I have been thinking about posting this letter for a long time. I have always talked myself out of it, thinking how on earth can one person change something so large and important? But isn’t that where the best ideas start, with one little voice in the darkness?

So hear goes…

This is my open letter to the Department of Education, UK councillors, teachers and pupils alike,

I am writing to you as a concerned citizen about an issue that keeps appearing in the national press.

It breaks my heart every time I see another teenager has taken their own life. The Samaritans website states that suicide now accounts for 3 times more deaths than road accidents and the Office for National Statistics website has said that teen suicide is at an all-time high in the UK. To me, this is a massive problem that needs some attention, but the Government seems to be focusing their time on the Brexit arguments and how much we should be spending on plastic bags while people are quite literally dying around the country.

As a survivor of the high school bullies myself, I know how it feels to be picked on. I know the pressures of exams and keeping up with the latest trends and all the other things that teenagers have to deal with but the difference nowadays is how blatant the idea of suicide is. It now dominates soap storylines, teen TV series, social media, something that I never had to deal with.

I know that there is a big drive at the moment, through various channels, to reduce the stigma about mental health issues but I still can’t help but feel like everyone is missing the point. Although it is amazing to get the general public talking about mental health, we are still focusing on talking about it. The old saying goes: ‘What you focus your attention on will grow’. I really think it would be more beneficial to put this effort into the solution of helping teenagers, rather than the problem.

A few years ago, I heard the famous quote from a very young John Lennon. His teacher asked the class what they wanted to be when they grew up. John Lennon said he wanted to be happy. The teacher told him he had misunderstood the question. John said the teacher misunderstood life.

I wish I had heard this quote when I was still at school. There is so much focus on exam results and what job you are going to get when you leave education, that the thought of being happy in life is totally overlooked. It is not even discussed as an option. I always knew I wanted to work with children once I left school, but that is only a very small portion of my life now. I am a teacher, but I am also a sports fan, I like to sing, I do all sorts of creative hobbies, I love to cook. My job is a proportion of my life, so why is the whole of our school years geared towards getting qualifications for a job. Why isn’t it teaching us about other areas of life?

I feel that a good solution to this problem is how we use the Personal, Social and Emotional class that is taught in high schools currently. With all the knowledge we have about mindfulness and how stress affects us, I really feel like the Personal, Social and Emotional curriculum could be put to better use. There is no formal qualification to be gained from this class. A well rounded citizen that is ready to live in the real world is the qualification. Each student will carry it within their thoughts and actions rather than on a piece of paper.

In Canadian high schools, every pupil has to undertake a ‘Life Skills’ class, where they learn about how to budget their finances, the jargon used relating to bank accounts and mortgages, car maintenance etc. Real skills that every student will need at some point in their lives. It is these skills that will show British students that there is a whole world out there to be lived in. The bullies and stresses that surround them now will be for a finite time, but this type of learning would encourage students to think past this time and plan for the future, away from the stresses of needing certain grades in the class.

My vision is to create a curriculum for these classes that would involve all of the skills needed to survive in this new, technological, social media obsessed world. Things like mindfulness, stress management, the Mediterranean diet, finance budgeting, political party values, interview skills, workplace Human Resources, running a business would all be worthwhile skills that need to be encouraged to show students that they have the power to shape their lives, rather than be sucked in by thoughts that drive them to ending their lives prematurely. It is turning the focus, making students think about what they can achieve, rather than being focused on the negatives in their lives.

Between the ages of 4 and 16, a child will split the majority of their time between home and school. Therefore it is the responsibility of the Department of Education to get children ready to live in the world. Currently, too many children are opting out of living.

So something needs to change.

Thank you very much for your time.

Yours sincerely,

Sarah

New Year, New You – Would you benefit from speaking to a therapist?

We all say it:

This year will be different.

This is the year I get fit.

This is the year I look after me.

But what if the thought of making new resolutions or thinking about starting another year is just too much to handle? It feels like the weight of the world is on your shoulders. Is having to fight to stay above the water is too hard?

I know there are lots of people out there who find starting a new year difficult. While everyone around you has that fake, perky optimism that the next year will be different, I know there will be some people out there who are more realistic. Nothing is going to change if you carry on doing the same things that you have always done.

Nothing is going to change unless you decide to live a different life. And you have the power to make that decision. The decision is always up to you.

I need to loose weight. In the first 6 months of last year, I did really well. I dropped 2 dress sizes but by September, the excitement about it had gone, and the bad eating habits crept back in. So this January, I am starting again with the Mediterranean diet but making little goals for myself along the way. I am trying to keep the excitement so I stick to it for longer. There is a dress I really want to get back into, so I have decided to try it on on the 1st of every month to track my progress. I will be challenging myself to make a new recipe every month and giving myself a treat day each month too to look forward to.

I am deciding to change how I do things in the hope of getting better results. Not just different results, but better ones.

It is very easy for me to sit here and type, saying do this and do that. I know that sometimes a little bit of extra help is needed to help you change the things you do not like about your life.

BetterHelp is an online therapy company, who can match you with an online therapist to talk to and give you the support you need. All the therapists have training in the field of mental health, and by being online, Better Help hope that they can break down the barriers to people who find accessing mental health help difficult.

Talking to someone about how you feel, and how you want to change your life can make you feel like you are supported in your goal. Having a support system around you can give you confidence, give you strength and give you accountability, meaning you are more likely to reach your goal.

You can do whatever you want to with your life, but the book starts and stops with your decision to change. If you want different results, try another way of doing things. You have the power. You always have the power.

Sarah x

Please note: This is a paid partnership article. These views are my own and they should not be taken instead of medical advice if your situation needs a professional. This article talks about general areas of life, not issues that need professional help.

Happy New Year 2019!

Happy New Year to everyone out there. I know it is now the 16th of January, but better late than never, right?

People keep asking me what my resolutions are this year. To blog more? To look after myself more? To be more organised? You name it, I need to do it!

Just before Christmas, I saw the book ‘The Little Bullet Book’ by David Sinden in Waterstones. I keep hearing about the joys of Bullet Journaling but I know what I am like. I know that I would be so caught up in drawing everything perfectly, that there wouldn’t be any time left to do any organising! I needed the page decorating and the sections drawing out for me to get me started.

The idea of Bullet Journaling is to keep track of all areas in your life all in the same book. It is a space where you can dump all your thoughts, your appointments, things to do in the future, things that have happened in the past, everything. But if you google Bullet Journalling or have a look on Instagram, it is full of beautiful drawings and creative ways of using a blank book. I found it all a bit off putting if I am honest so David Sinden’s book is just what I need!

I have filled in the yearly plan and the monthly plan for January so I have a focus for things I want to get done this month. With the best will in the world, you can’t sort your whole life out in one month. Unless you forego sleep, which I am not prepared to do!

The Little Bullet Book has a space each month to track your finances, a monthly calendar for appointments and a really good page each month to help you plan a personal project. I am so hopeful that this is the gem of organisational help I have been looking for!

Wishing you all a happy and healthy 2019. I hope it brings you excitement and love.

Please note, this is not a sponsored post, I am just super excited to share with you what I have bought!

Sarah x

Online Counselling -Making Talking To Someone Easy.

The official definition of Telemedicine is: ‘the diagnosis and treatment of patients via telecommunications technology.’

When I first heard that medicine was branching out into Telemedicine, I really wasn’t sure how it would work. How could a doctor diagnose your symptoms based on what you described in a live chat? Surely they would not be able to their job accurately without feeling your abdomen, or manipulating a limb, or taking your vital signs with their equipment. But then I thought about all the areas of medicine there are and how the approach to helping patients needs to be different for each and every patient to get the best care possible. Not everyone needs to have their pulse taken. Sometimes they just need to know that someone is listening to them.

There is such a big campaign at the moment in the media and through out the Internet to try and get help to anyone out there who is suffering from mental health issues. There are many people who suffer in silence, for a number of reasons, but often because they are unsure of where to turn to for help or because asking for help is just too frightening.

BetterHelp, who are an excellent online counselling company, approached me and asked me to write this article about how Telemedicine can be so helpful to someone who has some mental health issues, whether they are looking for some guidance and counselling or just to talk to someone about a difficult period in their life.

BetterHelp is made up of a bank of qualified therapists who all have knowledge and expertise in the field of mental health. You are matched with a therapist, who you can speak to through the Internet either on your computer or phone via video chatting or instant messaging facilities.

There are many benefits of talking to a counsellor online, but the one that I feel is most prominent is that sometimes it is easier to talk to someone about how you feel through a keyboard than it is face to face. We live in a world where many people make friends through social media because there is a greater sense of ease when typing how you feel rather than trying to explain it in words while feeling the social pressures that come with face to face conversations. Especially when the subject matter you are talking about is sensitive and difficult for you to express. Talking to a counsellor online means you can take the time to review what you have typed, make adjustments so you can say exactly what you want to, and send it when you are absolutely ready.

You can have these conversations with your online counsellor from the comfort of your own home, or in an environment where you feel safe, rather than going to a medical office, which can be a very stressful experience.  As these services are online, another positive of online counselling is that everyone can access these services. It doesn’t matter if there are factors in your life which make leaving the house extremely difficult or if you need to fit the appointments around the other commitments in your life, having resources online means it can fit in with you.

Obviously, online counselling might not be the right path for everyone,  but the positives of it may reduce the stresses and the reasons why someone has not sought out help before now, giving them a real opportunity to access some much needed professional help.

The Internet has changed so many ways in which we do things, and the ideas of Telemedicine shows that the Internet can help us in the medical world too, by eliminating barriers and spreading help to hard to reach places and to people feeling vulnerable and unable to speak out.

To find out more about BetterHelp and the services they provide, please follow the link: https://www.betterhelp.com/online-counseling/

When suffering from mental health issues, sometimes the help you need can come from the most surprising places. I hope that one of you out there reading this finds this article helpful and it gives you some confidence that there is a pathway to some help that is perfect for you.

Much love at this festive time,

Sarah x

Please note: This is a paid partnership with BetterHelp, however the speech and thoughts explained in this article are my own. This article cannot be used as a substitute for medical advice. I am just presenting an alternative way to access mental health advice. Thank you.

Positive Quotations

In this week’s post, I would to share with you some of my favourite quotes which help me in everyday life. If you put ‘positive quotes’ into Google, all sorts of results come at you and it can be quite overwhelming. Sometimes they can be so idealistic that you think it will be totally impossible to achieve that. I am hoping that by sharing a few quotes with you, it will make them seem more accessible and hopefully speak out to you. Please note, the way I have interpreted these quotes is my opinion only and not related to the accreditation of the quote. Things can be interpreted differently and this is only my opinion!

 

Keep facing the sunshine and you cannot see a shadow – Helen Keller.

I see this quote as a reminder that we always have a choice. If you choose to face the sun, the warmth, the bright and peachy side of life, then you won’t see the darkness that can cloud our judgement. It is a reminder than what you focus on occupies your thoughts. If you choose to look at the light and the positive, then you won’t be thinking about the negative. Your brain can only think about one thing at once, so make it a positive thought.

 

Be Mindful, Be Grateful, Be Positive, Be True, Be Kind. – Roy T Bennett.

Each of these statements are all things that we know. Each one seems obvious. But in the hectic lifestyles we live today, sometimes it is nice to just stop and think about the things that are really important to you. In this world that we live in today, with all the anger and the hate that flies around us, it is nice to think about how we should live our lives. Be mindful of others, be kind to all, be true to yourself and what you believe in. The real core of what being alive really means.

 

Be the reason someone smiles. Be the reason someone feels loved and believes in the goodness of people. – Roy T Bennett

It’s Mr Bennett again! I love this quote because it is such a reminder that sometimes we can be so obsessed with what is happening to ourselves that we forget to take a look around and see what is happening to those around us. There may be someone closer than you think who is having a rough time and would really appreciate a hug or for you to stop and say hello. I am not saying get talking to strangers on the bus, but have a think about a friend you haven’t heard from for a while and just check they are OK. There are so many people in the world who have mental health issues and a lot of people often say: ‘It didn’t look like there was anything wrong.’ when that person feels like they cannot go on. Checking up on that friend who is a bit quiet might just be what they needed to hear.

 

Whether you believe you can or you can’t, you will always be right. – Henry Ford.

This quote for me totally sums up the mind/body connection. If you believe you can do something, you will do it. If you convince yourself you cannot do it, you won’t. Simple as. It doesn’t matter who you are, where you are from or what you are doing, if you tell yourself you can’t, then you won’t! I have had this quote of my bedroom wall throughout all of my exam periods, GCSEs, A-Levels and University to remind me that when the going gets tough, I will do it. It may be hard, it may take time but I will get there.

 

Thank you for reading my four favourite quotes and I hope my explanations and thoughts on each one will have given those reading this some food for thought and hopefully made each quote a little more accessible. Hopefully you can see the applications they would have to your own life and I hope they spread a little positive and love!

Sarah x

Are you being cyber bullied?

The last 20 years has seen the rise in the wonderful world that is social media, without which I wouldn’t be writing this blog post. But what happens when this amazing tool designed to connect people together is misused? Unfortunately, being concealed behind a screen seems to give people the confidence to say hurtful and direct things that would not be said in real life.

I touched on this subject a few weeks ago about being more mindful about what we say over the Internet and how written words are different from spoken ones. Leading on from this, this blog post is a practical guide for those of you out there experiencing cyber-bullying.

Cyber-bullying is when messages of threat, intimidation or upset are sent to another individual or group with the intent of causing hurt or harm. Unfortunately, wherever you go in life, there is always going to be someone who gets a little bit of pleasure from upsetting others, for whatever reason. But when this upset is coming at you through your phone or laptop, when you cannot even see the person, it can be so intimidating.

Here are a few advice points that I have written to help someone experiencing cyber bullying:

1.You do not deserve to be treated like that.

Firstly, remind yourself that you don’t deserve to be treated badly by ANYONE. That’s a general rule of life. No one has the right to make you feel bad about yourself. EVER. Tell yourself that it is not your fault that you are in this situation. If someone else chooses to say nasty things to you, that is their choice, but how you deal with the situation is totally your decision and in your control.

 

2.Don’t respond or retaliate.

This is an important one. However tempting it might be to let rip and put this bully in their place, don’t! Because A) throwing shade back makes you just as bad as them, but also B) it is not going to help the situation, it is 100% going to make it worse and more often than not, it is going to make the situation escalate. More often than not, bullies are looking for a reaction from you so they know they have upset you. Retaliating to hurtful texts is just playing into their hands.

 

3.Don’t take matters into your own hands.

In the world of social media, things very easily go viral. So don’t be tempted, instead of messaging back, to share the posts/text messages with as many people as possible to ‘make an example of the bullies.’ This is cyber bullying too. Plain and simple. Don’t sink to their level. You are better than that.

 

4.Save the evidence.

The best thing about cyber bullying is that everything is written down, meaning you can save, screenshot or print what has been said. It eliminates the ‘well, she said…’ ‘No I didn’t…’ argument because it is written down for all to see. Save the evidence of abusive messages with the date and time stamp on them if possible. If things escalate, then you have proof to support what you are saying.

 

5.Tell an trusted adult and think about your next move together.

Whatever is being sent to you, you must tell an adult. A parent, a teacher, a neighbour, anyone you trust. Not so they can sort the problem out for you but so you can talk through what you want to do together. Two heads are always better than one. It also gives you a good opportunity to calm down and talk through what has happened before you decide what to do next. Anything done in the heat of the moment is often regretted. Take some time and get someone else’s opinion.

A trusted adult on your side will also be able to give some support if you want to make your school aware of what is going on on social media or if it is a matter for the police to deal with. This obviously depends on your individual situation but it is something to consider with someone you can openly talk to.

 

6.Use the social media tools available.

As standard and as a tool to protect their users, all social media platforms have a ‘Report User’ function for you to make them aware of unwanted happenings. They can then decide if the bully needs a time out or if they have violated the platform rules and need their account disabling all together.

If this feels a bit drastic to you, you might feel like blocking the person from contacting you is a more appropriate action for your situation. You should probably do that anyway so they cannot make contact with you.

 

7.Resilience is learnt.

One positive outcome of cyber bullying is a built up resilience, which is a skill that will be super helpful later in life. If someone is sending you horrible messages, the best thing to do would really be to ignore it. As hard as that sounds, they will soon stop it if they get no reaction.

When a new message pops up from that dreaded account, don’t open it. Just delete it. Whatever it contains, it won’t be helpful or add joy to your life so you don’t need to see it. If it carries on, use a different social media platform to connect with your friends. Remove yourself from the situation. The bullies will soon get bored and move on. It can be so hard to think like this when you are in the middle of a horrible situation but I promise you, it will end at some point. Each time you ignore a message, it will strengthen you. It will get easier. It will make you laugh at how ridiculous they are. Cue funny picture about how silly online bullies are:

You are in control because you can walk away. Or turn off your phone in this case.

 

If you know someone who is being cyber bullied, be there for them. They would really appreciate someone to talk to about it. Quite often people don’t want someone to swoop in and save the day, just knowing there is someone there so they are not going through it alone is often just the support they need.

My final piece of advice, and it is an important one, is this:

Please, please, PLEASE think about the things you are sending to other people electronically, whether it is over social media or texts or emails. Even when you are sending things to people who are your friends. How often do we see in the news that a celebrity’s sex tape has been leaked, or naked pictures that were sent to a boyfriend have ended up on the Internet for the world to see? Once it is on the Internet, it will always be on the Internet, you loose control over who sees it or shares it. Please think before sending anything so that you don’t end up in a difficult situation in the future. Please protect yourself. As sad as it sounds, people who are your friends currently may not always be your friends. If you aren’t prepared to put it on a bulletin board for the world to see then don’t send it to anyone!

Sarah x

Exam season is here!

Exam season is officially here! Much to the dismay of many of you out there. Exams are one of those things that you have to do, but nobody likes them and the stress of them can cause sleepless nights. Well done schooling system, bravo.

Exams were a great source of stress to me when I was at school, to the point where I would have a timetable of when to write a timetable for timetabling the revision, in a timetable. You know what I mean.

So I have compiled a list of handy tips to help you prepare for your exams. They are things I used to find helpful and I hope you do to.

Here goes:

1.Find your optimum time of day to revise. Have a think, or even a test, to decide if you revise better in the morning or the evening, or the afternoon. I revise best first thing in the morning, my concentration is better. But I have friends who can work until midnight and get lots done. I know that after 9pm, my brain turns off. Like there is some sort of a switch in there or something. So I knew I would get the most effective revision done by getting up early and doing my revision first thing in the morning.

2. Find a work space that suits the conditions you need to revise. This maybe your bedroom, or the kitchen table or your school library. Once you have decided where you are going to revise, you can tell your family that you are off to revise and you would appreciate not being disturbed! I need complete silence so I can talk out loud, meaning a shared room at home was not ideal for me and people gave me funny looks in the library at school so I decided that revising in my bedroom on my own was going to be my best option!

3. Grab everything you need before you sit down to revise. I used to get a glass of water, some snacks (preferably healthy ones but you know…) and all the books I would need. I would then, as hard as it was, put my phone in another room. My theory was that I could use my breaks to get up and have a little walk about and check my phone. Having a change of scenery made me feel a bit more refreshed and ready for more revision. Getting up and having a walk also helps to loosen your stiff body after sitting at a desk for ages.

4. Which brings me nicely to this: Remember to give yourself some relaxation time! Whatever relaxes you. A bath, watching a film, listening to music. If you work so hard that you burn yourself out, then by the time you come to sit your exams, you will be exhausted! So remember to schedule some time to switch off and relax. And don’t feel bad when you are relaxing. If you are working hard the rest of the time then you deserve a break!

5. During your whole exam/revision period, try and go to bed at a reasonable time to make sure you are refreshed for the next day, be it an exam or revision day. Having a good night’s sleep will do you the world of good. Particularly if you are having a bad day, a good night’s sleep will hopefully put you in a better mood for the next day.

6. Have a playlist on your phone or Ipod that gets you all pumped and ready to tackle your exams. Listen to it every morning or on your way to school for your exam. My suggestions of songs would be the classic Eye of the Tiger, maybe Fighter by Christina Aguilera? Or thinking out of the box, I’m Sexy and I Know It (!). Not only will the power of music make you feel more up for it, but having a dance will relax you and let’s face it, who doesn’t love having a dance as you get ready for school in a morning?!

7. It is exam day. You have done the whole lining up outside the exam hall thing, trying not to listen to your peers talking about how stressed they are (not helpful. To anyone. Why do they do it?). But here you are, looking at an exam paper, your stomach churning. First thing is first. Take a deep breath. Close your eyes and breathe slowly. Open your eyes and you are ready to go, calmly. Open your paper and read each question. Read them slowly and more than once. Sometimes your brain does this cute thing when you are stressed, it makes you read the question that you want to come up, rather than the actual words that are in front of you. How helpful. So read each question super carefully. Block out that annoying kid next to you who is already writing furiously. They will get a hand cramp soon and stop. Just concentrate on what you are doing.

8. Have faith in yourself. Find an inspiring quote, find a friend to talk to who is positive, make plans after an exam so you have something to look forward to. Whatever it takes to make you believe that you can get through the exam and produce answers to the best of your ability. That is honestly half of the battle. And it is a battle you can win! So push on young warrior and do your best. I believe in you.

If you have any advice that really helps you during exam season, feel free to tweet it to @notfallingover and I will retweet it to share with everyone. Or you can leave a comment at the Instagram page: notfallingoverblog

If any of you feeling like you need some further advice for dealing with this kind of stress, I have found a very useful website called Better Help. They specialise in connecting people with counsellors over the Internet for help, but their Advice section on the website https://www.betterhelp.com/advice/stress/ contains loads of amazing articles that are so helpful for lots of different kinds of stress. Please check it out, it is full of helpful hints and tips.

And finally, good luck to everyone who is doing exams at the moment. Let me know how you get on! You will smash them!!

Sarah x

Be Crayjust

This weekend I had the pleasure of exploring the Mind, Body and Soul exhibition at Event City, Manchester. I had never been before so I had no idea what to expect. The event was coupled with the Yoga show and Vegan Life Live so it was guaranteed to have something to interest everyone.

There was so much to see, I didn’t know where to start! So, obviously, I went methodically up and down the rows so no stall was missed! What can I say? I like order!

There was lots of different products and stall holders there but one lady was particularly interesting.

Sharon Corbett has set up a project called Picture This. She goes into schools and colleges using her love of photography and creative writing to get children to think about their life goals and things they want to achieve, while promoting self confidence and self identity. Sharon was so moved by the work being produced by these young individuals, she decided to make their affirmations and powerful messages into a book for all to read, named: BE CRAYJUST: REAL LIFE MOTIVATION BY REAL LIFE PEOPLE. It was amazing to read, especially when Sharon said that the children who contributed to the book were between 8 and 15 years old. The thoughts and positive messages these young people were wanting to share with the world were humorous, thought provoking, emotional but most of all, they were inspiring.

Sharon had some postcards made up for the Exhibition and I bought the selection below.

The wording on these postcards really spoke to me and I think they have such important messages. There is a lot in the media about ‘loving yourself’ and retaliating against ‘body-shaming’ but it is quite often forgotten that you should be loving the life you are living too. In amongst the struggle of exams and homework, it is hard to feel like you have control over what your life looks like, but it is so true. You have the power to create a life that you love. Strive for a job you want to do. Work towards a qualification that enables you to have the best experiences and meet the best people. As said above, ‘Follow the path that makes you, YOU!’

‘When in darkness, seek out the light.’ resonates heavily with me. I know from experience that when life is getting you down, it is very hard to see the positive in any situation. But it is when you are at your weakest that you need to make the decision to change how you think. You have to ‘see the light’. You have to be brave enough to get yourself out of the darkness. And it is so possible. You can do it. To have a young person write such a powerful message was very moving to me.

This project is a non-profit organisation. Sharon said the money she makes from selling the books and postcards gets put back into the project, which will enable more books to be published in the future. What an honour it was to meet her.

Give the project a follow on Facebook at: @BeCrayjust

Thank you Sharon, for putting such time and effort and affection into teaching young people about self identity and positive thinking. Our school system is so focused on statistics and grades, they are not teaching young people to find themselves and work towards creating a positive life for themselves, even though currently, suicide is the biggest killer of teenagers, having overtaken road accidents, making projects like these so important.

Sarah x

 

Hypnotherapy and Panic Attacks

 

In my last post, I discussed my experiences with panic attacks, which was very well received. Thank you very much for your positive feedback about it.

I have not posted a blog post for a while because I have been on holiday. 18 months ago, me and my two friends had a crazy idea to save up for an amazing tourist trip to California. We planned for the whole 18 months, deciding what we were going to do, where we were going to eat, everything.

As it got closer to us going, I was plagued by this niggle I usually get before a holiday. My fear of flying. Just thinking about stepping in the airport filled me with dread. Hot flushes, stomach back flips, wobbly legs, the works.

Going to America was also going to be the first time I had flown without my Mum to help me through it. Holding her hand during take off and landing, and her rubbing my arm when I started to hyperventilate helped me through the stress of a flight. I wasn’t going to have that this time, and I really didn’t want to make a fool of myself in front of my friends or the other passengers. So I needed a plan.

And into my life stepped Julie! I met Julie at a business networking session over a year ago and she talked so passionately about how hypnotherapy could help a variety of problems, I thought I would give it a go. I gave her a call and asked if she could help with my fear of flying and she reassured me that it was a common stress and she was sure she could help me.

I did not really know anything about hypnotherapy, other than what you see in films: someone swinging a pendulum and getting the recipient to do silly things when a certain word was mentioned.

Within a few minutes of talking to Julie, I realised that this was not what hypnotherapy was about at all. We talked for a long time about how I was feeling, both with flying and other things, including the panic attacks. I talked a lot about my low self esteem and how I felt it was holding me back in life. Julie not only listened to me (and passed the tissues), but assured me that how I was feeling was normal and common amongst others, and that I had the power within myself to change the way I think. Julie was very particular in making sure I understood that I had the power within me to change the way I thought. She would just be helping me through it. This feeling of empowerment I think has contributed to me getting so much out of the experience.

I was a little nervous when Julie told me to close my eyes and imagine myself in a beautiful place. But I found the visualisations and the journey I was undertaking very calming. I found myself relaxing into the chair I was sitting in and releasing the hypnotic sigh as I allowed myself to fully participate in the visualisations.

We talked about what had happened in my life that had influenced the way I felt in the present. School bullies, work pressures, health issues etc. Julie helped me work through them and release them from my thought process. It was so enlightening. I could literally feel the weight lift from my shoulders. I could feel my excitement for life returning after being squashed and shushed by my anxieties.

Julie also taught me some techniques to use when I am in a stressful situation, both physical things to do when I can feel a panic attack happening, and psychological things to do when I need a good talking to!

I am trying very hard to put into words how amazing I feel having had such an empowering experience. It is like someone has turned the light back on, lit the fire in my belly again. I have so many things I want to achieve in my life, so many things I want to see, or try, or do, but like most people, when the rejections and stresses knock you back, it is hard to keep your morale up. Hypnotherapy has boosted my mental state and more importantly, taught me techniques to keep myself up there.

And for that I will be eternally grateful to Julie and her teachings. Julie’s details will be at the bottom of the page and on my social media profiles.

Last week I returned from America having spent 27 hours on an aeroplane over two weeks and not a single panicky moment! I had never thought about hypnotherapy as an option for helping with life’s stresses but it has been life changing.

Sarah x

 

Julie Widdowson

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/juliewiddowsonhypnotherapy/

Website: http://www.juliewiddowson.co.uk